The fashion industry sets a very specific line between straight size models and plus size models leaving the girls that are in-between questioning themselves due to being so under represented.
I was one of the girls thinking “well… I think I’m closer to the straight size standards. In order to work and pay rent I need to lose 30lbs and get my hips to 36 inches” which was a really unhealthy obsession.
I spent up to three hours at the gym almost daily and ate greens without any dressing, mentally I was devastated and operated on auto mode, much like a robot.
I was so self-obsessed that I neglected the people that I care about, and as low as I got in my measurements I could only get to 37.5 inches. “At least get to a size 4” my agent said, but I couldn’t. It was a never ending chase.
When I let go of “skinny” I gained my weight back and signed as a plus girl (at size 8-10 / 10-12UK) who was now “too skinny”, so I tried to gain weight by doing more weights and eating more. I needed to be 2 sizes bigger in order to get booked as a curve model… but ended up unhappy again. I learnt to accept my body as it was -gain or lose weight, I take care of my body and mind first.